My how life has changed!! Here it is almost 9pm on a Saturday night and Chris is sitting on the couch playing with Payton, I just finished cleaning up the kitchen after a home cooked dinner. This time a year ago we would have been out doing something… hanging out, going out to eat or to a movie… I wouldn’t trade this life for anything though.
These last two weeks have been some of the craziest times of my life. Payton finally arrived and we couldn’t have been happier. She is the most perfect little girl. When we were in the hospital and the pediatrician came to see here we just didn’t have a good feeling about that doctor… she seemed so spacey. Payton was born on Tuesday and she told us to make an appointment for her the following Thursday, over a week later. Now, I was exclusively breastfeeding, and everything I read said that she should be seen within the first few days after leaving the hospital to make sure everything is going well with weight gain and such. When she was born she was exactly 7 pounds. When we left the hospital she was 6 pounds 8 ounces. Well, since we didn’t really get a good feeling from the pediatrician we made an appointment with a different doctor for Tuesday. We went in expecting everything to be normal, but she was down to 6 pounds 2 ounces. She also had only had one bowel movement since we brought her home from the hospital. But she lost 13% of her birth weight. Normal weight loss for an infant is no more than 10% of the birth weight, so the doctor had us admitted to the hospital. We started supplementing with formula and they monitored her weight gain. The first day she only gained 5 grams and still hadn’t had another bowel movement so they kept us overnight again. The second day she gained quite a bit more and was up to 6 pounds 5 ounces when we left. As miniscule as it may seem to be hospitalized for weight loss but as a first time mom I was a little scared. It was so hard to watch them try to take blood from her, she was so good though, barely cried. Me, on the other hand, I cried quite a bit. I was worried something might be really wrong. As it turns out they think she wasn’t getting enough nutrients from the breastmilk so her body was holding on to everything it could, which is why she wasn’t pooping. Being in that situation really made me appreciate the parents who have kids in the hospital full time. I can’t image that. Even just 2 days in the hospital wondering if everything was ok with my baby girl wore me out. I knew all along God was in control… but I have to admit I still struggled with worry. I feel like I went through mommy boot camp on crack. I’m thankful for the experience though… it really taught me a lot.
Being home with her the last couple of days has been nice. She is so sweet to watch. She makes the funniest faces and doesn’t even know it. I’m just in awe of the fact that just 2 weeks ago she was still inside my belly… No words can describe the depth of love that I have for this little life. I often find myself just staring at her, wondering what kind of plan God has for her life. I’m so thankful that he sees me fit to care for this little one. I know these past 2 weeks have gone by fast, and I’m sure time will continue to fly… but for now i’m content soaking in every moment with my little princess 🙂
imperfectly courtney 